What is relationship counselling and does it work?
Relationship counselling generally consists of talking with a qualified professional about any issues you may be experiencing in your relationships. The aim is to find ways to overcome these challenges and make positive changes towards improving your connections. The effectiveness of relationship counselling will depend on your individual circumstances and the willingness of both parties to contribute towards achieving a successful outcome.
At the end of the day, you can only be responsible for one side of the equation – YOU. As long as you give it your best shot and do everything in your power to make things work, that’s the most anyone can ask. As the saying goes – ‘it takes two‘.
This applies to any relationship in your life, and we have many. You have relationships with family, life partners, children, professional colleagues, and friends. At any time we can experience difficulties in these relationships – given our lives are built on relationships, this is inevitable.
What relationship counselling can do, is help you to:
- identify how the relationship is currently functioning,
- understand how you feel and what you expect from the relationship,
- consider how each party meets their responsibility for contributing to and achieving expectations,
- explore what actions you are prepared to take to make the relationship work, or
- worse case – examine whether parting ways might be the best solution and how you facilitate same.
Signs a relationship might be in trouble
In order to successfully overcome a relationship crisis you first need to identify and acknowledge the signs that something isn’t quite right. Some of the more common signs of relationship issues include:
- feeling lost or discontent in the relationship,
- unable to establish or hold effective communication,
- not wanting to spend time with the other person,
- seeking out activities to avoid interaction,
- a sense of detachment and disinterest in the relationship,
- repeated conflict about the same issues,
- concern you are not meeting the needs of the other, or
- feeling your own needs are going unmet.
If you are noticing these or similar signs, you will benefit from talking about what’s at play in your relationship and how you can attempt to resolve the situation.
Common causes for relationship problems
There are any number of things that can lead to problems in your relationships. Not all will be within your power to control or change. But some of the common causes can include:
- Life stressors – work pressures, health issues, family or money problems;
- Conflict – between values, viewpoints, goals, and expectations;
- Time constraints – whether real or manufactured, impacting on positive time together;
- Lack of interest – one or both parties have lost interest in contributing;
- Trust issues – from ineffective communication, maladaptive behaviour patterns, past traumas or relationships.
These are just a few of the issues that can affect your relationships. Whatever the cause it is best to talk things out rather than avoid them. The sooner you do this, the easier it will be to achieve a successful outcome.
How I can help
I’ve worked hard to maintain my own relationship for over 25 years. I have survived parental separation and divorce. And I have been successfully engaged in many professional and personal long-term relationships – I understand relationships on a very personal level. Together with my professional qualifications and continued development, you have someone at hand who is well equipped to help you overcome any relationship issues you might be facing – at home, work, or socially.
Through confidential and secure online or telephone counselling. I can help you:
- identify the issues affecting your relationship,
- examine any changes that may be occurring,
- address underlying personal issues,
- modify unhelpful communication or behaviour patterns,
- strengthen your ability to assert your needs, negotiate outcomes, and resolve conflict,
- cope with a relationship breakdown and how best to move forward if necessary.
I provide individual therapy, support, and guidance for any relationship you wish to improve. I will work with you to find the best approach for managing your particular relationship concerns. If you are seeking support regarding a personal partnership, you may already be undertaking couples or marriage counselling and it has been recommended you do some individual therapy to work through personal matters. Or maybe you want to start with individual therapy first and a referral to couples counselling is something we discuss as a possible course of action as we progress through our work together. Whatever stage you’re at, whatever relationship is in question, if you’re not sure if my service is the right one – give me a call or drop me a line and we will work it out.
Work we can do together might include:
- increasing awareness of behavioural motivations, patterns, and functions,
- exploring past experiences that may be impacting current relationships,
- building effective communication and problem-solving skills,
- enhancing your assertiveness and negotiation strategies,
- growing your self-confidence, and
- helping you make any necessary changes to achieve your desired outcome.
Your sessions with me
You can book your sessions directly with me starting right here on the website simply by using the Contact form.
Sessions are conducted online by video chat, or over the phone. You decide what best works for you. And you can switch between the two depending what you feel like on any given day. If you want to chat with me on the phone while sitting in your pj’s from the comfort of your couch – that’s fine by me.
Working online or by phone means your sessions are accessible from wherever you are so long as you have access to a phone or computer. This is especially helpful if you are in a rural or remote area and unable to get to a metropolitan location for support.
My session times are flexible so you can fit them in around your other commitments. This is great if you’re unable to attend sessions inside standard office hours of other counselling services.